Part 1 here.
I had to change my definition of hope because never giving up was killing my soul and stealing my light.
We've all had those dreams we've wanted our whole lives. The dreams we've worked very hard for. The dreams we maybe even paid lots of money for.
The dreams we will do anything for.
But what happens when our pursuit of that dream begins to take more from us than it will ever be able to fill back up?
Losing ourselves to our dreams means we have nothing left of ourselves to enjoy them if they come true.
And so we must practice active acceptance of what we cannot change and grasp on to a new and more realistic hope for ourselves.
The only thing, ever, in our lives that we must never give up on, is ourselves.
And for some of us, this includes the work of letting go of what we hoped would be and practicing active acceptance of what cannot be changed.
Yes, we chose to stop infertility treatments. A choice between shitty choices; keep going and wreak more havoc on our well-being and our finances or determine our enough and begin the difficult work of redefining.
To let go of the dream that was destroying me by accepting what is not in my power and grasping onto a new, realistic hope was the only way to truly be okay.
When hope grows up we practice active acceptance and never give up on ourselves.
Tomorrow we'll talk feeling it all to make room for the light.
“I said to my soul, be still and wait without hope, for hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love, for love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith, but the faith and the love are all in the waiting. Wait without thought, for you are not ready for thought: So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing.” ~ T.S. Eliot
My debut coloring journal, Taking Flight, is now available via CreateSpace!!!